December 2008
16 posts
10:08 pm
Christmas was good :)
I got things I wanted, and I can’t wait to use up those gift cards.
11:03 pm
Christmas Eve.
It doesn’t feel like christmas eve. At all. In any way. Yes, I’m stoked for tomorrow. But, I wish it would feel like it’s Christmas tomorrow. Like when I was younger.
I miss my youth.
I miss putting cookies out for Santa.
I miss pretending to go to sleep at 10, but really staying up to try and see Santa.
I miss being so excited that I could not get to sleep...
he makes my world better.
Me: i feel like as we get more and more serious, i give you more and more reasons to fall out of love with me.
and i don't say that as a fucking guilt trip
or as an excuse
or a reason for you to flatter me with why you love me
i say it because i really don't understand
like, i look at myself. and i loathe how i act when i'm with you.
Him: i guess its because no matter what you do i will still be in love with you, because that will never change
Me: i just feel like you fell in love with the girl on the internet. not the girl in real life. and now she's beginning to look completely different than what you thought.
Him: no, thats absolutely not how it is, dont ever say that.
Me: but how are you so sure?
Him: because im still talking to you, and still want to have a future with you, even after i witness the not so great moments
its like a parent and a child, no matter how much the child fucks up (you dont fuck up much, so dont take it too personally), the parent still loves the child, because it is their child.
10:49 am Thoughts.
I’m wearing my thinking cap and I’m going on an adventure.
I don’t want to know the ending. Just let it come, and when it does, I’ll be ready.
Thank you, but no thank you. I’ll keep my questions and you’ll keep your answers.
Grey skies, skeletal trees, yellow grass. If love is in the air, I don’t want that kind of love.
I am the artificial creation of...
12:21 am
Today was an exceptionally wonderful day.
First time I’ve seen him in two weeks, and I tell you, he looks like a fine young fellow.
It’s incredible, because every time I kiss him, hug him, look into his eyes, I feel that same euphoria of the first day we met. I feel that same excitement, rush, and pure joy. With the other guys, those feelings died out within a few days. With him,...
“Death is nothing at all. I have only slipped away to the next room. I am I and...”
– Henry Scott Holland
8:00 DAY 7
Just got back from the opera. It was so good. I really want to go to operas more often.
I still miss him, but things are getting easier.
Made it through a full week, already. My mom’s gonna see if he can still go to the polyphonic spree concert still this Saturday. If he can, that’ll be awesome, but if he can’t, it’ll be okay too cause Drew will come with me.
I’ve...
3:06 DAY 5
I had a good day.
I wore my big green sweater and my glasses and i got a lot of compliments on both, even if I did feel like a complete dork.
Right now i’m in Mr. Bowden’s room. Cause he’s cool like that. I don’t really know where he went, though. I got to meet Tyler. He’s alright. I’m going to the film club meeting at 4:30 and we’re going to watch...
10:05 DAY 2
Today was…okay.
It was the best after my college class. I met Tori at Gloria’s and we had the best talk that I’ve had in ages with anyone. I think we are going to be very good friends.
Johnallen and I were able to talk more today than yesterday, and that made me so happy.
I love him.
